hindsight

hindsight is everything.

if only hindsight could be seen first, 
the process, the journey would be different.

yet, my character, my faith,
wouldn't waver, wouldn't grow, wouldn't change
if it weren't for hindsight.

oh.
[can you hear the groans?]
the groans that come from being in the midst of a situation and not knowing which way to go?
the agony that comes from waiting.
the doubts that fill the soul.
questioning.
is God even here?
does He care?
am I walking through this alone?
is He even who He says He is?

oh. 
[can you hear the groans of the centurion?]
i heard them this morning in matthew 27. 

"and behold, the curtain of the temple was torn in two, from top to bottom. and the earth shook, and the rocks split. the tombs also were opened. and many bodies of the saints who had fallen asleep were raised, and coming out of the tombs after his resurrection they went into the holy city and appeared to many. when the centurion and those who were with him, keeping watch over Jesus, saw the earthquake and what took place, they were filled with awe and said, 'Truly this was the Son of God!'"

hindsight is everything.
the centurion dared not believe in Him.
he watched as Jesus died.
yet, the circumstances changed right before his eyes.
there was no denying Jesus is the Christ.
the centurion believed now. 

had he experienced Jesus as the Christ before,
he would have wept and worshipped at the base of the cross.

if i experience Jesus as the Christ before and through my circumstances, 
i will do the same.

the beauty of hindsight
is to look back and see Jesus in the midst.
in the thick of it.
hidden at times, yes, it may seem so.
yet ever present.
ever faithful.
ever true.
ever powerful.
ever real.

Jesus loved that centurion just as much as his first moment on the cross as the last breath breathed on the cross. 
He knew the very moment when the centurion would believe. 
and i imagine that as the centurion looked back over his days leading up the earth-shaking, life-changing experience, 
he saw Jesus in the midst.
he saw Jesus for who He really is. 

so in longing to get through the process...
to move through this season and get on to the next...
enjoy Jesus in the midst.

hindsight might be everything,
but knowing, living, and believing Jesus is Who He says He is,
in the midst of circumstances, 
in the midst of a long and dry season,
makes hindsight gloriously hopeful.